MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
