Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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