I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
