He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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