went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
