Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I wish you could order shots online.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
