Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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