Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
