ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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