I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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