the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
