i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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