Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
