Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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