and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
