how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
