Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
