I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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