So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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