All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
no you cant smoke seaweed
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
