HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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