do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
