How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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