new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
