I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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