I don't think brook has ever known best
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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