OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
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