So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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