Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
