Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
