East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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