Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
