I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
