I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
