we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
