How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Randomize
