im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
