Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
