I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
As shirtless as possible
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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