i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Randomize
