I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
