No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
