that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
