I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
