found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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