There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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