I cockslap morals
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
