I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
