why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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