i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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